Why I joined Substack

Why a man with 64,000 subscribers would start over with zero.

I’m terrified that I’ll find out I’m not a good writer.

I’ll talk more about that later. First, we need to go back.

Creator Science started 8 years ago as a simple daily newsletter. I was working with a coach named Chris, who helped me identify an extremely limiting belief.

One afternoon, he told me to go for a walk. I was to take a notebook, but not my phone, music, or any other distractions. He told me to listen to my internal monologue – what was it saying?

Turns out, my inner critic is pretty harsh:

I am not an artist. I don’t have good ideas, I can’t do creative work, and I am less valuable because of it.

Chris is a great coach. He challenged me to take that limiting belief and prove myself wrong. At the time, I was in my mid-20s and dreamed of being an author. Having recently discovered Seth Godin, I decided that the best way to prove my creativity was to start writing a newsletter.

Daily.

So every day for a year, I published a short, unimpressive, navel-gazing newsletter (not unlike this one) just to prove I could.

And it worked! In year two, I pared back to weekly, and that newsletter has now grown to 64,000 subscribers under the Creator Science brand – a media company earning $800,000+ per year.

During this 8-year journey of building the company, I’ve worn many hats and taken on many identities, including writer, podcaster, YouTuber, teacher, and community builder.

As the business has diversified beyond a newsletter and required more from me, I’ve stopped identifying as a writer. It’s such a small percentage of the work I do now – and yet, becoming a published author is still the dream.

At some point, dreams need to be pursued.

That’s what brings me to Substack.

In some ways, I feel like I’m restarting my writing journey. Yes, I write and publish two issues of Creator Science each week, but as the brand has grown, the company needs a specific part of me. People come to Creator Science to learn and grow as creators, and I intend to fulfill that promise.

As a writer, I know that container.

But I’ve lost touch with writing about the messy, human side of my life. I’ve also gotten further and further away from being a beginner, and more than 75% of my audience are just getting started today.

What if I had to start over?

That’s also what brings me to Substack.

It’s easy to point to my success to lend my words weight, but I started 8 years ago! Things are different today, and I haven’t felt the excruciating pain of deafening silence in a long time.

So I’m here to practice writing. To get outside the Creator Science brand voice and truly inhabit my own (maybe I’ll find they aren’t so different after all).

I’m also here to learn the platform. An increasing number of creators inside our membership (The Lab) are writing on (or considering) Substack. I pride myself on having a strong working knowledge of the best platforms available to creators today, and Substack was a blind spot.

And I’m here to be a beginner again. What does it feel like to build from zero? Of course, I recognize I have some advantages with my name and reputation – I’d have to write under a pseudonym for a complete beginner experience.

Oh…I’m also working on a book. There, I said it. I’m currently in the proposal process, and if all goes according to plan, I’ll be full-on writing a book by the end of the year. Some of that writing will fit within the Creator Science container, and others won’t. This Substack will be a perfect place to test those parts that don’t fit within the Creator Science ecosystem.

I’ve been on Substack for two months now. At first, I was just reading other people’s writing, lurking on Notes, and then I began posting on Notes myself. At least a month ago, I knew Substack would be my next experiment.

But why haven’t I written more?

I know I’ve been hiding from the work. Hiding behind excuses like “not knowing what to write about” (but I defeated that excuse years ago)!

So, about an hour ago, I returned to the prompt from Chris. I went for a walk, turned off the podcast I was listening to, and just started listening to myself.

That’s why I haven’t been writing.

I’ve held onto this imagined future of being an author for so long. The idea that I may not actually be a great writer and the disappointment I’d have to face…It’s just so much easier to delay that possibility.

Besides, I’m “busy.”

In a brief moment of strength, I pushed myself to sit down and write this. It didn’t take long, because it’s what was real.

I’d love to hear what you thought.

Cheers,
Jay

PS: I activated paid subscriptions yesterday. We have three tiers:

1. Free: For the casual reader. Access to free blog posts (weekly-ish).

2. Paid: For fans who want to get deeper into my brain. Access our Subscriber Chat and private journal entry sections of the blog.

3. Trustees: For the special few who want to support my journey to becoming an author. You get the paid perks, the ability to start Threads in the Subscriber Chat, random surprises, and a soft spot in my heart for believing in me.

I write a morning journal most days. Paid subscribers will see some journal entries (stuff I’m not quite brave enough to share with the whole Internet) and early updates into my book-writing process.

Regardless of whether you ever become a paid subscriber, I appreciate you reading.

PPS: I recorded an episode of my podcast to go deeper on what I’m doing here, which you can listen to in your favorite player!